I Have An Idea For A TV Show

I have an idea for a TV show.

It would be about young women; beautiful women. And they will each vie for the affections of one guy. They will lie, cheat, steal and cry to get what they want. Him. The show will regularly feature them in revealing clothing. The guy will also be a liar just to up the drama factor. And there will lots of kissing. Lots of it. He will have to kiss every girl, you know, to try them on for size. In other words he will be test-driving them. But I would have to be careful to make the guy seem at once desirable and also reprehensible. Or he could be mainly one or the other as long as female viewers can see the potential for the opposite.

The show will be a hit mainly because we are taking so many women's secret desires and giving them a cathartic release. The irony, of course is that if they were treated this way in real life - you know, with no self-respect - they would be furious. Pretty funny, huh? Yep, I will be laughing all the way to bank.

You wanna know the kicker? This show will even illicit the regular patronage of those who espouse traditional values! You want to know why? Because it's only for a little fun with the girls. And fun is what matters the most. There is no small niche for this kinda thing. It's gonna be huge. Women will pull for particular girls - imagine this, we will try to put at least one "good girl" on their each season - the ideas are flowing now - and the 'good girls out there will pull for her. What if she gives in, you ask? All the better, ratings will soar as the women judge her between laughs and looks of incredulity.

I wonder if there would be a market for one with one girl and lots of guys...I'm gonna be filthy rich.

Our Most Recent Support Letter

Dear friends and family, Jan 14^th 2010

We now live in Birmingham, our hometown. Our last six weeks have been full of joyful rides on curvy mountain roads ascending and descending through valleys dotted with homes bedecked with Christmas lights. We have spent many nights and afternoons with family and friends. Some friends are new and some have been around for a while and are rejoicing in our return. We look at each other at least once a week and say, “We live here now.” It is surreal and often feels like a dream.

It is funny how dreams can morph into something bigger than yourself. They can take you out of your Universe and plant you elsewhere. Imagine dreaming about getting a new Chrysler and then waking up to find a Lexus in your driveway. Has the dream come true? Yes…and no.

Before I “let the cat out of the bag”, let’s get Biblical. The dreams of the Israelites were not delusional or even illusional. They were born out of the promises of God for deliverance and redemption. Jewish heads were put on pillows with visions of a Roman butt kicking. But then they stepped out on the porch and saw Jesus. Awesome. Actually they did not see his awesomeness. They saw only the disappointments of their small dreams. Jesus promised an awakening and they preferred to be asleep.

When I moved to Birmingham I harbored a dream of planting a church from scratch. There were some people interested and I was getting encouragement from friends, family and other church-planters. Two days after moving into town, I was sitting with Johnny Grimes, who planted Branch Life in Birmingham just over a year ago. There we sat in Momma Goldberg’s in Homewood on 18^th St. and Johnny proposed marriage - the marriage of Branch Life Church with my vision for Homewood.

Surprised on one level, I was not startled. Before this conversation, everything else felt like a distraction from the dream. This felt like, from the first moment, an enlargement of the dream. It still feels that way many weeks later.

Little did I know, Johnny had been challenged by someone else to consider this course months earlier. He had been interviewing me for some time by stealth. And I gotta tell ya, it is refreshing to be interviewed without knowing it.

So what will I be doing? I will be doing pretty much everything I would be doing anyway; preaching, small group ministry, looking for a location to meet and leadership development. The grand thing about it all is how I will not be doing it alone. You know, Paul and Silas, Laurel and Hardy. Bono and the Edge.

One of the things I was worried about was, “Will I be able to bring anything to the table?” “Yes”, I was told and told not very gently, “You are now the old guy.” While I am certainly not the oldest guy involved at Branch Life, I will bring some years to the leadership.

I love being part of Branch Life Church. On Sundays, there are about 70 people joined together. They are black and white, single and married, young and “old.” On the first Sunday of 2010, in the first baptismal service of the one-year-old church plant, 5 adults were baptized. That’s incredible.

Upon leaving student ministry with a bitter taste in my mouth, I learned something I would not trade all the darkness for. I learned what everyone acknowledges but no one really puts any stock in. I learned that the spread of the gospel is vastly bigger then I am. Therefore I must want the gospel to spread even if I don’t get to be a part of it. Once you get to that glorious country of self-forgetfulness in ministry it is not much of a journey from planting a church to joining a church-plant.

To be honest, I am a little scared of church planting by myself and well, ministry in general. Addicted to applause and pats on the back, I am a prime candidate for Church-Planter Idol. In our current evangelical culture full of rock-star preachers, it will be good for me to preach less than a couple dozen times a year.

I am sure there will be more than a few of you who will think this looks like a demotion of some kind. “For goodness sake, you have gone from dreaming of being a lead planter to joining an already existing church-plant.” It is a demotion. And that is why I call this the enlargement of a dream.

“What do we need?” Thank you for asking. First, we need prayer. We need prayer for…

1. Our emotional health. Pray the gospel would daily help us keep things in perspective.

2. Pray we find an affordable house in the Homewood area of town. This is no easy task. Apart from the supernatural work of God…well, pray for us.

3. My car died. I am mourning the loss. Praise God we have a car to use for the time being The church whose house we are living in has loaned us a nice one. Pray also we would find one soon.

4. Finally, ask God to draw people into Branch Life Church (branchlifechurch.com) for our good, their joy and the glory of God.

Also, we are in need of financial support. Branch Life is able to pay me $20K for 2010. But I must raise the other half of my salary and funds for the ministry expenses of the church. Please prayerfully consider either giving a one time donation or giving monthly. Thank you so much to those who have already given. It is much appreciated.

Grace,

Matt Redmond (for Bethany, Emma, Knox and Dylan)

Confession of a Failing Pastor

(I wrote the following back in August of 2009, I was at my wit's end emotionally. It was so bad, when we went on vacation to Birmingham to visit family, I was prepared to stay. Never to go back. I was right in the middle of despair. My guess is, a lot of guys in ministry get to that place and it is a terrible place to be. Accountants can experience despair and go do something else and it looks heroic. Pastors? No way. They are expected to rip open their shirts and reveal the S on the their chest. Bullets are supposed to bounce off and sermons just appear. All the while kryptonite is hurled at them through email, social media and meetings in coffee shops.)

Whether I am failing as a student pastor or only perceived as failing is at this point moot. Well, maybe not entirely. But the effects are the same. Right? I mean, it is neither here nor there if the whispers are there, the discussions are going on behind your back and the arrows are flying. The truth of the matter is perhaps a very important thing for the Senior Pastor/Preacher/Lead Pastor and possibly for someone who oversees an adult ministry. Why? Because they trade in truth.

Me? I trade in bodies, numbers and pizza. And it is amazing that the decrease in that which I trade in is the reason I feel as if I am drowning. Usually, the abundance is the difficulty. Usually you drown in abundance. In my case it is the stark nature of the thing. There are not enough bodies. I am not doing enough. I do not care enough. When or what is enough? How would I know? When everyone is happy?

It’s like a hall of mirrors really. I went to one at the Alabama State Fair back in elementary school. To be honest, it freaked me out. You turn one way and you are fat. The other way shows you as remarkably short. Another turn and you are twisted beyond all recognition. And all the reflections make it very hard to actually get perspective on the distortions and see reality for what it is. Even when you find the exit…exhausted, have you escaped? Are you not still trying to catch your breath?

I vowed to never go back in.

Today I went to bed twice for short periods of time. Is this healthy? It felt healthy. When you are hungry, you eat. When you are cold, you put on more clothing. When you are tired – soul-tired - you lay down. Still.

Twice this week I am supposed to teach and for the first time in my ministerial life, I am not looking forward to it. This has never been the case before. I have always fed off the enjoyment of doing this. But right now I just want to hang out with Sam Adams and Billie Holiday. I just want to hang out with my wife in silence with small talk sprinkled clean by laughter. I want to watch my kids play and tickle them every now and then. Another nap would be welcome also.

Do I need a vacation? Am I burnt out? Maybe. The only path of sanity I can find is quitting. And I do not mean quitting this ‘job’. I am talking about quitting altogether. When you start envying the Fed-Ex delivery driver, something is not right. Can you quit for just a week or two? Perhaps I could start back then. But a few weeks of not being a “Pastor” (or at least what I am told that is) would be welcome indeed.

I used to talk about wanting to quit every week. That was very different. I knew I could not quit. The “call” was clear. Now not so much. Before, I could read something in the Scriptures or in a book that would drive me further in. Now what used to be fuel is retardant.

Not doubting my salvation is a great deal of help. The gospel is still good news. I don’t want to leave the “church”. I don’t want to leave my family. As a matter of fact these are the two things I want to run towards. Some may call it selfish but I want to be ministered to for a while. Emmylou Harris is singing My Baby Needs A Shepherd.

None of this is written for pity. There is cathartic help of course. But I really could find nothing like this anywhere. They are probably there somewhere. I did find some articles and essays about how pastors overcame their failures. Nowhere, though, did I find anything like a confession from a failing pastor in the midst of failure. “My name is Matt Redmond…not that Matt Redman…and I am a failing pastor.”

Some Thoughts While Reading Eugene Peterson, Part 3

So I am sitting here reading Christ Plays in Ten Thousand Places by Eugene Peterson. In fact, the goal is to read through all his books this year. When you gain so much from them, you want to tell everyone to read his books as much as time and money afford. There is sanity in them. Strange. Not sanity as opposed to insanity only as much as opposed to inanity. There is a serious beauty here beyond grasp but that draws you nonetheless. His writing is doing a number of things.

First, it is becoming painfully clear that I have pretty much failed at all he is teaching me as a pastor. I am angry with myself and I am still craving to drink deeply from the very source that is causing me pain. Jesus did this also, you know. And I catch a whiff of the Christ when I read his rebukes of my ministry. He has been near him and learned from him. Just as it was painful for the woman caught in adultery and yet glorious to look into his eyes of grace, I love learning that I am wrong from him.

Second, I am seeing the full blown reality of so many edges and shadows I glimpsed previously. For years there have been ideas, thoughts and emotions fiddled with. Played with. But they all seemed so out of sync with the day's ways of doing. However, not at all confident I would be taken seriously, well, you know...

An example? Certainly. We tend to celebrate the electric and exciting. The big and the bold, which gets noticed and makes people say, "Yes! There is God moving!" We act as if God is not moving unless this is the case. Thus our desire and celebration of large crowds. And thus our lust for the event-driven ministry, which is something we can point to so easily. I have had this sneaky suspicion - which I have in turn failed to act in accordance with - this is not necessarily what God is after. Usually. Peterson has helped me see (to paraphrase his words) that God is not after our spasms of passion but our long line of obedience in the same direction. When we inordinately crave the stupendous and exciting and bombastic we have shown our unbelief in the work of the Holy Spirit, who works so often unseen by our eyes and is pleased to move through the regular, consistent, ordinary means of grace given by God for our good and His glory. No wonder our obedience of faith has careened into the retaining walls of consumer-driven retail religiosity. We simply do not believe - in all our talk of God-centeredness - he is enough and he will save people.

Last, I am enjoying his works because there are so few good writers in Christendom. And the ones we do have are Catholic usually. Why is this the case? Because we are happy with crappy writing as long as its "Christian." We write unoriginal books with sleepy sentences and mundane paragraphs. Our fiction is either the same story repeated again and again or it is ripped off from whatever is selling in the secular markets. Rarely is our prose good writing other than technically speaking. Every sentence by Eugene Peterson has a poetic ring to it. He chooses words like they matter. His sentences never feel throwaway. For us to be a people who are shaped by a book filled with poetry, our writings have no echo of it. Indeed, Peterson points out that the first words expressed by a human in Scripture are poetry (Genesis 2:23). Our doctrines are full and deep. But our writings are hollow.

And Peterson has turned me onto great writers. One is Annie Dillard who writes like no one. No one. She is singular. And I can hear an echo of her genius beauty in Peterson's own words.

It is actually frustrating for me to try and capture this with my own words. Most likely I've no business trying to use words to convey my love for his words and his appreciation for them. My wife, I have tried to use words to convey my love of them to her. As Patient as she is, it is always sounded weird to me till I read Peterson talk about words.

You know what? If you had told me a year ago I would be reading Eugene Peterson the way a drowning man clings to a life preserver, I would have thought you no prophet. Shows what I know.

In Praise Of The Ordinary Jesus

'"Because of this many of his disciples turned back and no longer went about with him" (John 6:66). Because of what? Because Jesus was so obviously human -- so ordinary, so uncharismatic, so unexciting, so everyday human.'

Jesus would have made a terrible youth pastor.

There Is No Prophetic Voice Speaking Into the Sports Culture

This past weekend I read an excellent article on the subject of Sport and Christianity. It was the cover story of Christianity Today Magazine. The main argument is that we have, as evangelicals have drunk (drank?) the Kool-Aid instead of speaking into the Sports Culture. This to me was an unusual piece and set it apart because well, you see, no one is talking about this. At all.

There is no prophetic voice speaking into the Sports Culture.

This article is a start. A good start. The problem? No one seems to be reading this article (if Twitter is any indication) and if they are, they are not talking about it. If there was an article on being missional in our culture or missions in Zambia - or especially on church planting, it would be forwarded all over the place. But Sports? Perhaps we are a little too invested to look at this closely and think deeply.

For some reason the evangelicals I know have no problem with themselves or others being so invested in a game/sport they will malign, make fun of and ridicule referees, officials, players and fans. They will curse, have ruined days and talk in moral terms regarding trades, playing time and get into violent arguments over ability and who has been hired to coach. Has anyone ever stepped back and thought, "this is weird"?

We argue on message boards, on Twitter, facebook and the radio. Argue? Really? No one is really talking about it. And do not get me started on the optional nature of church attendance and the compulsory nature of our kid's sporting endeavors. Am I guilty of all this? Yes. Without a doubt. Of course. The crazy thing though is...and this is no exaggeration...no has ever talked to me about it. Never.

Every Gift Is From Above... Except The iPad Of Course

As soon as Steve Jobs came on stage and the iPad was announced, the criticism came. I'm not talking about those who wanted more features on Apple's newest innovation (multitasking, flash-support, etc.). I will get to these folks later.

No, I am talking about those whose first public reaction was to slam those who were excited or even interested in the announcement. Now I am sure there was some serious coveting going on and certainly some idolatry but is that all? Is there any good going on at all? Must we be indifferent and point out the dangers to these kinds of cultural happenings to be righteous? Of course, we all know how much easier it is to see things wrongly. But if the Spirit is at work in the people of God - the Church - must we only assume the worst and then blog and tweet our judgement? Should we not assume that there are things worth celebrating that are not done by the Church? Can we not be very interested in technology and also be wary about how it will affect us? Must we only assume evil hearts that have not been changed so things are seen rightly?

I tend to think all the initial criticism should fall on those who are already mad about a product yet to be sold. Not one unit has sold and already there are people tweeting and blogging their frustrations about the iPad's limitations. Really, you're mad? These are the people who are seriously having idolatry issues. Being mad about the limitations of something you do not need is the height of arrogance. We should be much less apt to criticize those who stand in wonder at the beauty of a technological advance. There is a childlikeness in the excitement I enjoy seeing. And there is an adult pseudo-maturity that stands aloof and frowns upon those who are enjoying the moment. Or rolls its eyes in contempt. Give me the idolater any and every day.

Children? My son, Knox turned 4 a couple of days ago. His heart is an idol factory, as John Calvin said. These objects of worship manifest themselves in the form of helicopters, planes and rockets. Take one away? Crushed! But what kind of a Father would I be if I did not rejoice in his enjoyment of the gifts, made by unbelievers (in other countries) and get excited with him...knowing I will have to have some serious discussions with him about how he feels about his new toys? I don't want to be aloof and above his excitement. I want to play with him, with his toys.

When the Gutenberg Printing Press came on the scene in the middle of the 15th century I am sure there were detractors. But let's face it. Movable type?! Books will no longer be handwritten? Certainly this was a reason to get wildly excited and interested. Right?

The men I spend my time with love books. We are pastors ergo we love books. Of course no one is challenging my love of books and the idolatry that lies nasecent in my heart over a new book or set thereof. Why? We romanticize that which was once not so common. Books were once less common household items than iPhones. And the Gutenberg Printing Press is credited with changing the western world with its innovative technology. Reformed theologians get excited about this (and rightly so) because it meant the gospel spread quickly through the printing of Bibles and Christian literature that were then distributed everywhere. But it also ushered in the printing of books that were not always beneficial. And this continues today. The difference? No one is upset about what Gutenberg did, we are still glad he did it.

So can we not just relax a little. Actually no, don't relax...we should be very uncomfortable with our knee-jerk judgmentalism so devastating to the church and the cultures/communities we find ourselves in. The gospel will not be served by our cultural naval gazing. It will serve to confirm the suspicions of a post-christian populace that we really have no interest in grace, we really are moralists to the core, sniffing out the filth in everyone's lives.

Besides, if an iPad showed up on your door...would you be glad or would you roll your eyes?

"I Will Build Jesus' Church"

I have a theory that I hope is wrong.

There is a lot of talk at conferences, on blogs and in books about how pastors need to take care of their marriages and families. This is a good subject and I am glad people are talking about it. But I am wondering why we are talking about this so much nowadays. Why the need to talk about this so much now? I do not think the answer is simple and flat. It is possibly multilayered and very complex but I have a sneaky suspicion about one reason in particular.

Today's pastor is expected to be almost anything but a pastor. He is leader and CEO par excellance. He is not only the man charged with steering the boat - keeping it afloat but he is also the program director in charge of drawing people onto the ship. He is a manager with a winsome personality. Therefore pastor search committees best be looking for Type A types.

As Eugene Peterson writes, "If we all get caught up in running the store, who will be the pastor?" Well, my guess is the guy running the store will do his best to be. He will sacrifice his "off days" and time with his family to do all this. Thus the need for all the talks about family health.

He has bought into a subtle new and improved version of the first lie. "You shall as be as God for your people. You will save them. You are responsible so you better be responsible. It is up to you and that is why attendance has been down. Work harder. You are the Messiah for this congregation. Save them with your works." Of course just like the first lie this one contains a significant amount of truth. That is why it is so hard to counter.

No one really believes what should be the hope-building words of Jesus when he says, "I will build my church." "No, no, no Jesus. We got that. At the expense of our families and marriages and friendships we do the ministry."

I suppose one issue making a pastor's marriage and family are so important a subject is because they are an example to the rest of the congregation and the larger community. Yep, maybe. But even more is the example of the pastor's belief that God is the one who saves and Jesus will build the Church. But is it any wonder our people struggle with grace? When we are willing to sacrifice our families on the altar of ministry, should we wonder?

No one says it outright and most of the time all this is so subtle and so harmless looking, we never really see it happening. But let's stop and think. It seems like nothing is happening at your church. It needs a boost, right? New program! New event! More work. (By the way, no one ever suggests more prayer...unless praying about a new event or program.)

We are like bloggers who want more readers so we start doing giveaways. Why should our people buy into grace if the pastor and the leadership of their church cannot stop working and planning at the expense of their wife and kids? We tell them to stop working for their salvation. Why? Because Jesus did all that was necessary for us to be saved. We just relax in his love and grace and believe the the good news. We then tell them Jesus will build his church but we need a new program so people will be excited and more people will come in.

And lets face it, not so far deep down we want to look really, really busy.

I Really Should Apologize to My Professor Jerram Barrs

I remember taking a class in Seminary class called "Pastoral Theology." Actually I remember very little about it. A number of fellow students were into it. They loved the class. Me? Not so much. It was taught by Jerram Barrs and everyone sat in awe. I wanted REAL theology. This seemed sorta truncated and secondary. In that class he assigned a Eugene Peterson book.

I remember sitting outside of Edwards Hall on a bench facing in the direction of the bookstore and the upper parking lot. The library was on my left and I remember some traffic of students in front of me. It was after lunch and I was most likely waiting for a class to begin. This Peterson book was in my hands. I was reading it...kinda. Not really. My heart was not in it. The stories were compelling but I was not into it at all. It did not feel "Reformed" to me.

Stupid Feelings.

So here I am 8, 9 years later and I am wishing I had had a whole course simply mining that one book. Eugene Peterson is refreshing; a poet and a pastor...a pastor's poet. A poet's pastor. And Jerram Barrs is a genius for assigning the book. Although we should have been made to read the book. Eugene Peterson's books for pastors are saving my vocational life right now. I just wished they would have done so sooner.

Everything that young pastors are so geeked up about these days, Peterson was talking about 20 years ago.

Peterson was talking about God-centeredness before anyone.

Peterson was talking about 'story' before anyone.

Peterson was talking about the glory in the ordinariness of ministry before anyone.

Peterson was talking about the trend towards silliness in our spiritual lives before anyone.

Peterson was decrying the programmed nature of contemporary churches before anyone.

Peterson beat the drum of fighting against the commercialism of spirituality before anyone.

The whole time I am reading his books -- my plan is to read through them all this year -- I am laughing at how refreshingly original they were but no longer are. My wife is probably getting tired of me talking about them. I keep interrupting her own reading. You are probably wondering which book it is I should have read. He has at least 4 books for pastors. Actually it just doesn't matter. You should read all of them. And I should apologize to Professor Barrs for not reading the book like I should have.

Cultural Engagement Double Standard

Last night a conservative Republican won a Senate seat that was long held by the poster Child for Liberal Politics. As soon as it happened, I knew - because of my cynicism - that there would soon be a slough of tweets and status updates from pastors and other Christians decrying people's happiness regarding this event.

Geez, it happened before I could even tweet about it.

It comes in many forms and typically looks like a "I'm more spiritual than you" posture. Here is sampling of what you might see...

1. "Don't look for Jesus on Capital Hill." Or there will be some variation of this theme. As if being glad someone of your political persuasion won an election is the same joy you have in Jesus.

2. "I am worried about how happy people are about this." Why? Because you know everyone's heart? Because you are certain this must needs be a nefarious desire by rednecks to get a good ol' boy in the White House? Or because you think there is no possible reason a Christian can be happy a conservative is elected? Perhaps they are glad because they do not like the health reform plans in motion now. Perhaps they do not like the fact we cannot as a nation pay for such a plan. Perhaps they are worried about how it will affect the poor.

3. "If you think this will make your life better, you might have too much trust in politics. You need to reevaluate your life." Well, that depends. I suppose I could have put too much emphasis on this and for a time think this fixes all my problems. But I know no one who thinks like this. I don't. However, I do think it is OK for a believer, who longs for heaven to see something happen and do something to make their life on earth better. If this is not the case, then we should not care about clean water and medical care in Haiti. Hell, we should not care about medical care for anyone, anywhere at anytime if we can't agree with this. Our desire for heaven and our contentment with what Jesus has bought us - namely adoption, justification and joy forevermore - should not cause us to buy into the idea he cannot bless through temporal means - even politics.

As a matter of fact, I am not nearly as concerned about those who are glad Scott Brown won in Massachusetts as I am about an emerging church culture that is too cool to care about these things, to aloof to understand why people are glad and too spiritual to care about what happens in this world. Wait. But they do care. They care about music and movies and art and french press coffee. They care about hip TV shows like Arrested Development and Dexter. They care about hip restaurants and cafe's everywhere. They read all the right books and they do it all in the name of cultural engagement.

All the while, we're not supposed to care about votes in Washington. We are to simply be as monks when good and bad laws are passed it seems. Never rejoicing when a good thing happens. Never upset when a bad scenario ensues.

How about this? Can we not be glad when something helpful takes place in our nation's capital and thank God for it? Can we not be sad and pray to God for help and intervention when legislation is passed we don't agree with?

Must we be stoic, go home and watch 24 (recorded on DVR) and pretend it never happened?

I Used To Feel Bad When I Did These Things. Now I Just Feel Accepted

A question has been brewing in my mind for a while now. It has stung me deep even though it arose as a result of seeing it others. I suppose that is the way of things. And to be honest, Twitter and facebook have helped me see this more than anything

Since when do we as pastors get to ridicule, heckle and make fun of people? A celebrity does something heinous, immoral, and unethical or ridiculous and we batter them on Twitter, facebook, our blogs and radio shows. If a TV preacher says something stupid we call them names and we ridicule them publicly. An athlete or coach does something we don’t like in the sport (read: game) they compete in and we make fun of them…unless they play for our team. Since when is this normal behavior for pastors? Or anyone?

I used to feel bad when I did these things. Now I just feel accepted.

Granted, we don’t do this if it is someone cool. We don’t do this even when heresy is flirted with or espoused outright. We are all fine with calling Pat Robertson an idiot in social media space. But if someone calls Rob Bell one, we make excuses and get all thoughtful. If it is Bono or Chris Martin, we genuflect. If it is the hackneyed preacher or pundit – we virtually curse them and insult them. And no one even blinks.

This is not about civility. This is not about being a gentleman or anything of the sort. This is the betrayal of our true belief in the gospel of grace. Our belief is virtually, “I was/am the worst of sinners saved by grace. Did you see what that guy did/said? That guy is a moron.”

We are shot through with a rapacious desire for mercy for ourselves and people like us and oh yeah, the anonymous poor. But we are drunk with the blood of lady justice for everyone else. We get up in the morning and paw at every crevice for the gospel of grace in that divine book. And then we crawl over to our computers and tweet judgment against sinners between sips of French Press. We are the parody of what we ridicule in fundamentalism.

We don’t burn to show grace and lovingkindness and mercy to people because it is not cool and that is the righteousness are after. That is what we pine for the most. We want to appear before other men and women as justifiably cool. We want to taste the rare flavors of being rock stars. Showing radical love and refusing to talk evil of people behind their back has no cash value in the mall where pastors shop for credibility and acceptance.

Instead of standing on the shoulders of giants we stand on the shoulders of Conan, Letterman and whoever else has good comedic timing. Funny wins smiles and laughter. Love - Jesus-type love for sinners, self-righteous and libertine gets your man card taken away.

Listen, they will not know we are Christians by our desire to help out in Haiti. We should, of course. But that would just make you part of the club called “everyone.” They will know we are Christians when we love each other as Christ loved us, when we love our enemies and show grace to those who do are not believers and yet are not our enemy.

But you know what we do? We say, “Yes, I will love other believers as Christ loved me. Yes, I will love my enemies (whoever they are). But I will make fun of celebrities, fundamentalists and whoever else will make other people laugh at my wit. And retweet me. And “like” my status on facebook.

Our conversation is either characterized by virulent anger or stinging humor. Rarely is it “gracious, seasoned with salt.” Rarely is it actually the overflow of our being marinated in the story of the gospel of grace in Jesus. And I think I am so used to it, I feel as if I am not being myself when I resist the urge. We are like fish, who have no idea what water is.

We have a savior who took on flesh and was held up to derision. How can we deride? He was born in the sticks and it caused people to wonder if he could actually be worth anything. How can we be snobs? We worship the one who wept and talked of the beauty of flowers. Why do we demand a machismo divorced from the Scriptures?

We, as evangelicals have traded in kindness – Christian Love for something else. It is accepted but it is truly something else.

A New Years Resolution for 2009

Yes. I did say 2009.

Most of the time, those who enter into that sacred rhythmic act of making and breaking resolutions do so with failures of the past year in their rearview mirror. Think about it – resolutions don’t come out of nowhere. They are the balm applied to a wounded conscience regarding the life lived in the past year. They are do-overs. We take a mulligan, pick up a different club and try again. Almost all resolutions are inextricably bound up in the misdeeds or the undone ones of the 12 months previous.

So here is a resolution for all of you who failed miserably last year. Resolve to believe the gospel of what God has done in Jesus to save you from all you screwed up last year. For some reason we have bought into the idea that God has forgiven all our sins we committed before we ever believed in this gospel of blood-bought forgiveness. But after we believe we must make some kind of penance for all we have left undone and ummm, done. That isn’t good news; it’s crappy news.

How about this for good news? Every sin you committed last year was dealt with on the cross. It has been forgiven. Gone like the wind. “…as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us (Psalm 103:12).” It is as if you have never sinned. You stand before God pure as the freshly-fallen and driven snow. Resolve to believe it.

Believe it even you if you committed what you think is a terribly sinful sin. Why? Because you do not stand in front of God naked as so many people lead you to believe. Resolve to believe that lie no more. You stand before God robed in the rich garments of Christ and his work on our behalf. You are in Christ.

Now no one else will treat you like this. Well, perhaps some friends and family will but do not expect the police to forgive you as God does. God forgives the gravest of crimes against humanity but you still may have to pay that fine or spend some time in the big house. But even as you sit in your cell you are the freest of me from all your sins.

Make no mistake. There aren’t any exceptions. Grace is free. Gratis. You don’t get to pay for this with new and better lives in 2010. You can’t even if you wanted to do such a foolish thing.

Can you hear them? You know, the voices and concerns of those who want to say “but…” and “well then…” There is grace for them even, grace bigger than the world –the world of earned righteousness they reside in so miserably. And the good news? The good news is they can resolve to do this in 2011.

5 Social Media Resolutions for the New Year

I resolve to use Twitter and facebook to make fun of people and ridicule more, especially famous people who cannot even know I exist. It makes me feel special when people laugh at my 140-chracter wit and isn’t this how they will know we have been with Jesus?

I resolve to practice my righteousness before men as much as possible on Twitter and facebook.

I resolve to retweet famous rock-star type pastors only and look for good quotes that will be retweeted by people. It makes me feel oh so good inside.

I resolve to use Twitter and facebook to make people feel guilty about their failures and sins and help them question their love for Jesus. After all, I don’t really believe in sanctification by faith in the gospel anyhow. And who wants to hear the gospel tweeted every. single. day?

I resolve to look down on those who do not use these social mediums and question the relevance of pastors who don’t especially.

Christmas Is For Haters

About a year ago, I heard from someone about how difficult Christmas would be because of some heartbreak in their family. What got me was the utter hopelessness and devastation. Christmas would be impossible to enjoy because of the freshness of this pain. I have been thinking about this conversation for a year.

I get it. I mean…it makes sense on the level of Christmas being a time in which there is a lot of heavily concentrated family time. The holidays can be tense in even the best of circumstances. Maneuvering through the landmines of various personalities can be hard even if there is no cancer, divorce or empty seat at the table. What makes it the most wonderful time of the year is also what makes it the most brutal time of the year. My own family has not been immune to this phenomenon.

But allow me to push back a little. Gently. I think we have it all backwards. We have it sunk deep into our collective cultural consciousness that Christmas is for the happy people. You know, those with idyllic family situations enjoyed around stocking-strewn hearth dreams. Christmas is for healthy people who laugh easily and at all the right times, right? The successful and the beautiful, who live in suburban bliss, can easily enjoy the holidays. They have not gotten lost on the way because of the GPS they got last year and they are beaming after watching a Christmas classic curled up on the couch as a family in front of their ginormous flat-screen. We live and act as if this is who should be enjoying Christmas. Thanks, Hallmark.But this is so damnably backwards. Christmas – the great story of the incarnation of the Rescuer – is for everyone, especially those who need a rescue. Jesus was born as a baby to know the pain and sympathize with our weaknesses. Jesus was made to be like us so that in his resurrection we can be made like him; free from the fear of death and the pain of loss. Jesus’ first recorded worshippers were not of the beautiful class. They were poor, ugly shepherds; beat down by life and labor. They had been looked down on over many a nose.

Jesus came for those who look in the mirror and see ugliness…for daughters whose fathers never told them they were not. Christmas is for those whose lives have been wrecked by cancer and the thought of another Christmas seems like an impossible dream. Christmas is for those whose marriages have careened against the retaining wall and are threatening to flip over the edge. Christmas is for the son, whose father keeps giving him hunting gear when the son wanted art materials. Christmas is for smokers who cannot quit even in the face of a death sentence. Christmas is for whores, adulterers and porn stars who long for love in every wrong place. Christmas is for college students who are sitting in the midst of the family and already cannot wait to get out for another drink. Christmas is for those who have traded in failed dreams. Christmas is for those who have squandered the family name and fortune – they want ‘home’ but cannot imagine a gracious reception. Christmas is for parents watching their children’s marriage fall into disarray.

Christmas is really about the gospel of grace for sinners. Because of all that Christ has done on the cross, the manger becomes the most hopeful place in a Universe darkened with hopelessness. In the irony of all ironies, Christmas is for those who will find it the hardest to enjoy.

I Have Lost My Appetite for Football

Every year my wife and I long for football season to arrive. The convergence of cooler weather, SEC football and my wife's chili make for many smiles in our home. I went to Auburn University and grew up in a home where every Saturday the TV was on and tuned to a ballgame. We didn't care if it was even some bush-league Big 12 game (Update: then the Big 8), we were watching.

And when we had decided to move to St. Louis so I could go to Seminary, we started pulling for the Rams and got very into the NFL. We love Sundays curled up on the couch (yes, this is no exaggeration, my wife loved to do this) watching pretty much any game. Sunday nights and Monday nights revolved around those games.

Not so much anymore.

I read everything by Malcolm Gladwell. Everything. If he wrote a book of Haikus on the habits of prehistoric arachnids I would try to get a first edition. Signed, even. This Past October I read his article for the New Yorker entitled, "Offensive Play" about Football, Dogfighting and Brain Trauma. The gist is there is a link between brain damage and the everyday collisions and concussions that all football players are subjected to in each game. Gladwell provocatively asks us to consider our outrage over the entertainment of dogfighting which is so brutal and if we are prepared to be outraged over the findings of scientists in regards to football players.

My stomach churned as I read this article because it took my love of a game and threw it against conviction, which I must admit sometimes is not a very hard surface.

And then there is this article over at SI.com about the physical toll, football took on Pro Bowler and Super Bowl Champ, David Louis Pear. (HT: Zach Nielsen)

"Don't let your kids play football," he says. "Never."

Every time there was a player lying on the turf still and straight as a board, I would look over at my wife and she would look in my eyes - we both knew we were watching something that should not be happening.

Let every man and woman be convinced in his or her own mind. But it has gone from feeling like good clean fun to being a part of the mob in the Roman Coliseum. I have said very little about it because I have not been all that sure how I should react. Now I have hit a wall of conviction, firm and steadfast.

Let me make it clear I have no expectation of people adopting my conviction and would not argue for my position with anyone. Since I read the article by Gladwell, it has been very hard to kick the habit of not caring about who wins and loses. Usually I am elated by a Colts win and a Pats loss. But since October they both just felt like losers in what has become an industry machine at the expense of health and well-being for husbands and fathers. Husbands and Fathers, for the love.

How am I able to give up what was such a passion? The gospel, clear and simple. How could I, even if this is not conclusive information, not be satisfied with the grace of God - even if it costs me a cherished hobby/interest/affection/possible idol? Is Jesus not enough? The sufficiency of my place in Christ before God is enough when other men question my toughness and convictions.

They will ask for my "man-card". They will call me extreme and ridiculous. Whatever. They will expect it to be short-lived till Auburn becomes a better team. And they will call me a legalist. That is fine...my need to appear manly may need to be nailed to the cross also. Maybe.

Update: NFL asks players to donate brains for study.